Now that I don’t have to get approval on my decor, I feel like I really decorate the way I want. I’ve always loved the Shabby Chic style (refer to Rachel Ashwell). I don’t want to overdo that whole style, but I do plan use it in moderation. I found a few pieces I’m going to use, and hopefully it’s going to work the way I want it.

The first two pieces are from Kohl’s. I actually plan to paint the iron frames white and sand them a bit so you see the darker iron in some places. I think white, or even eggshell, will make the pieces look better and work better with the style I’m aiming for.

I found these really cute, shiny ornaments at Pier1 Imports (bought 4). I’m planning on adding small round mirrors to the centers rather than use them for small pictures as they suggested. Then I plan to hang them from the pegs of a white shelf. I will probably change the ribbon to a shade of light blue or green. I think white would be a little too much against the white pegs.

And last but not least, I found canisters at Pier1 Imports that I think will work with this style. I only got the “flour” and “sugar” since I don’t drink coffee enough to use that one, and the cookie canister was much larger and just didn’t look right with the small flour and sugar canisters. I absolutely love them!

I also found shower curtain hooks (by the Simply Shabby Chic brand) that I’m going to buy. I picked them up while we were at Target, but put them back without buying them. As we walked around a little more, I thought I should go ahead and buy them since they only had one set left. Unfortunately someone got them before I could get back to that aisle. Ah well. That will teach me to just go with my gut and buy something if I really like it (and can afford it of course).

I have never been sick during Christmas. Well, not that I recall — I am getting old, so I don’t know how reliable my memory is at this point! Landon was sick last weekend and the first part of this week. Then Nikki started getting sick, and she sounds like she’s on the verge of pneumonia (but won’t see the doctor..sigh). Now my throat is getting sore. It isn’t to the point where it feels like razors, but I know it’s coming. I don’t have a fever (yet), but I started coughing a little about half an hour ago. This stinks! I’m going to take something for it before I call it a night. With any luck I’ll be able to avoid getting too terribly sick like everyone else.

Earlier today I decided to go ahead and get my baking out of the way. I made cupcakes for my mom’s party tomorrow, some for Nikki’s co-workers at the bank and some for Kim’s (dad’s girlfriend) family party. I decided to do Devil’s Food Cake & Strawberry mini-cupcakes (though I’ve only take photos of the Devil’s Food Cake so far). Don’t they look yummy? Trust me… they are!!

Now all that’s left is to wrap the last 2 gifts. One for my brother in law, which will actually be from Tyler, Landon & Trent. The other is for Tammy, my mom’s friend & roommate. I was hoping I wouldn’t have anything left to wrap after tonight, so I’m thinking I may even just put their gifts inside of gift bags instead. I think I’m out of ribbon, and I would prefer to have ribbon on a wrapped gift — yes, I’m that particular about it.

I’m supposed to stay the night with Nikki tomorrow night, Christmas Eve. At this point, I’m thinking I may just stay with my mom since she’ll be by herself Christmas day. Nikki is just so sick and I really don’t want to get whatever she has.. if I don’t already have it. As much as I really want to be there when the boys open all of their gifts, I’d rather not get that mess. Guess I’ll figure that out tomorrow.

Speaking of my mom though; she called me tonight and asked if I took one of the gifts, from her to me. I told her no, of course. Well it turns out it’s the handbag (one of two from her that I know I’m getting lol) I was looking forward to having the most. I really hope she finds it. She said she’d already unwrapped all of the other gifts under her tree (like 50 of them) and it wasn’t there, but she remembers wrapping it and putting it under there. I don’t remember her giving me anything but gifts to the boys, so what I’m thinking is she’s put the wrong labels on something.. I hope. :/

I have some laundry to attend to now, and I guess I should go on and take something for my throat..

Christmas is almost here. Only a couple of days left to finish up what little bit of shopping I have left to do and finish all of the baking I have left to do. Speaking of which, I did a little baking tonight — baking two different kinds of shortbread cookies. I’m not at all fond of the chocolate ones. They’re not terrible, just different I guess.

I’ll be baking cupcakes tomorrow, for the small Christmas gathering at my mom’s Christmas Eve. My nephews will be helping me decorate those. We’re doing white icing, swirled on top, with red and green stripes along the swirls and then we’re topping it off with Christmas tree sprinkles. I have a feeling my sisters kitchen is going to be a disaster for a couple of hours. Thankfully we’ll have time to clean it up before she gets home.

I’ve been rather “blah” these last few days. I think it’s the change in weather (going from mild to much cooler) and all the running around I’ve been doing. I feel like a chicken with it’s head cutoff! I think I have everything together, gifts purchased and ingredients too. Then I get home and realize I forgot something. The sad part is I’ve been taking a list with me every time I’ve had to run out to the store. For some reason I’m striking out items I haven’t even put in the shopping cart. Ha, ha. I think that’s a sign that I just need to stop now. Just live with what I’ve got!

A part of me is going to be so happy when Christmas is over..

How we finally worked our way through wrapping every single gift, I do not know. I am, however, so happy we did! All of the gifts. I am such a perfectionist with gifts too. I know that the paper is going to be ripped to bits, but I still really enjoy wrapping and decorating each gift. I suck at making those fancy bows, but I can still work a little magic. Examples below (one wrapped gift, two gift bags finished with Christmas tree ornaments)

I really love the wrapping paper in the first photo. Blue is one of my favorite colors, so it was really nice to see something other than green, red and gold wrapping paper. I did a few gifts in those colors too, but only before I found the pretty blue one!

I thought I had finished up with my Christmas shopping, but it dawned on me earlier that I still need to buy a gift for my dad’s girlfriend. It wouldn’t hurt for me to get a little something else for my dad and mom too. I know I want to buy my mom a box of Turtles — her favorite chocolates — too. I’m not sure what else to buy for my dad. Any suggestions? That won’t cost me a fortune?

Overall, I am pretty excited about Christmas. I’ve said Christmas is exhausting a lot recently, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy this time of year. My nephew Tyler is going to flip out over the autographed Jimmie Johnson (Nascar, #48) pictures. I can’t wait to bake cookies for “Santa” with my nephews too. We’re making all kinds of goodies actually; cookies of all kinds, fudge and maybe even some truffles if I get motivated enough to try them this year!

The only thing that could possibly make Christmas a little better at this point would be a miracle — snow. Not enough to slow us Georgia folks down, but enough to at least stick to the ground. It would definitely be better than all of this soggy stuff in the forecast that’s for sure!

OK, Christmas in it’s entirety isn’t nerve-wracking, just things like; shopping for gifts, not really knowing what to buy someone, planning parties and cleaning up the aftermath of those parties.

I have only just started my Christmas shopping and we’re down to less than 2 weeks?? Ouch! I did manage to order Nikki’s (youngest sister) oldest boys their comforters. Tyler is really into skateboarding & skulls, so I found a bedding set that will be perfect for his room in their new house (pictured below, on the left). Landon wanted a beach & surf theme for his room. Since he loves “Surf’s Up” (movie), we went with that (pictured below, on the right).

I have no idea what else to buy for these boys, and Trent (their younger brother). I usually have it a little more together this time of year! I had originally planned on buying them each a set of pajamas. My mom beat me to it. I do have wall-decals picked out, but my mom is acting like she’ll be buying those too! I asked the boys to make out a Christmas “wish list” a few weeks ago, but they insisted on mailing it off to “Santa” that very afternoon. Unfortunately Aunt Teesa (what they call me) isn’t one of those lucky folks with the photographic memories — AT ALL. The only thing I can remember from the entire list are these few things; Jonas Brothers (Landon), Rock Band Country (and my sister has already gotten this) and, a million dollars — the best impossible gift ever!

For everyone else, I’m clueless. My parents both swear they would rather us not buy them anything because they have everything. I really should write out a list of who I still need to buy for and possible ideas. Actually, I should have done this last month. I’m getting a headache thinking about this stuff!

Speaking of my nephews though; Landon had to write sentences using specific words in each one a few days ago. I chuckled a bit at #11!!

I really should stop procrastinating now though. I have a design I need to finish troubleshooting and we’re having a Christmas party this evening that I should probably pretty up for!

So, this entry will kind of be all over the place — sorry!

I’ve been having really bad headaches again. I know it’s stress from all of the “drama” that seems to consume my life these days, but still. It’s getting old. I’m tired of going to bed with a headache and waking up with one. I really don’t like to medicate myself, but when I do take something for it, it doesn’t really help all that much. Maybe when everything eventually settles down they’ll go away.. maybe?

I was going through some of my older files earlier. And by older, I mean from back in 2006-2007ish. Back when I lived in Douglas. Aside from my life with the soon-to-be ex husband, I do sort of miss that time. I really want to visit a few of my friends from there; Tamara, Jessica E., Diona and Chastin especially. But, and maybe this is strange, they sort of bring back memories of “him.” I guess because I met these friends while I was with him? It certainly will not stop me from catching up with them, but I think it will be like that for the time being.. at least until I’m divorced from him (and that part of my life).

Speaking of that; is it weird that I can’t bring myself to even go by the house we bought together in 2002? Each time I’ve been to Douglas since I moved back to Georgia, I just can’t make myself drive by there. Not that I really have a reason to do that, but even being near there makes me queasy! I think if I ever did I may end up throwing rocks at it, kind of like “Jenny” in that one scene from Forest Gump.

Oh, yeah.. the whole point of me talking about this stuff was because of some of the photos I found. I found one of my little Bell Bell (Bella). Gosh I miss that fat cat!

Wasn’t she the cutest not-quite little thing? It is still weird not having her around. I know Jynx still misses her too. And speaking of Jynx.. she’s been doing a lot of biting lately. She’s bitten me several times today alone, once right on my bottom lip. I’m not even messing with her when she’s doing this. It’s just like she looks at me and thinks “Hmm, I think I’ll take a chomp out of her lip right now…” She was roaming around my bedroom, then hopped up on the bed with me and out of nowhere, comes right up to me with what seems to be complete and utter intentions of biting me.. and she did. I though she was going to rip my lip off, seriously! I’m not sure what this whole biting thing is all about but I have got to figure out a way to stop her from doing this!

Well, I need to fold up some laundry and finish working on two designs — one is nearly complete, I’m just incorporating the photos for the flash header and the second is about 40% complete (header is finished). Off I go.

I got an email from the soon-to-be exhusband this past Friday. Exactly 10 months to the date I returned back to Georgia, he’s finally signed the divorce papers and waiver of jurisdiction, had them notarized and has mailed them. He emailed me over the weekend with the tracking number. I can feel huge weights lifting from my shoulders. I guess I just don’t really feel like I’m released from “him” until everything is final, and it looks like we’re getting closer to things finally being final. It’s been a long time coming. I didn’t expect things to take this long, but in the end it’ll be well worth the wait.

I still feel like I’m going to drive myself mad. I’m up, then I’m down. I’m ready to hop off of this roller coaster ride I’ve been on, for good! I feel myself pushing people away. I don’t know why I do that. I don’t want to do it, but it’s just like.. I can’t seem to control it. I feel like eventually I’ll push people too far away.. and never have the chance again to keep them close. I suck. I hate all of this emotional crap I’m still tangled up in. I think it’s starting to hurt my relationships with some people (friends and family alike).

My mom has asked me to go with her to Saint Simons Island this coming weekend. I haven’t decided if I’m going to go or not. I mean, it would definitely be nice to get away from the drama and stress, and just relax for a bit — especially on the beach. I just don’t know. If I do, I’m hoping we’ll have the chance to play some mini-golf, which I actually love. I’m such a kid at heart. Is that a bad thing?

I really don’t have much else to offer tonight.

I’m getting really bad about updating this sucker, huh?

The last few weeks have been rather hectic to say the least. I’ve dealt with watching a sick nephew that came down with the flu, then I came down with it myself, a lot (that is an understatement) of family drama, getting caught up on work and that whole redoing my bedroom thing. I’ve been busy.

Before I get too far in my venting session, I’ll share a photo or two of the changes I made to my bedroom. I apologize for the poor quality of these — thank my cellphone.

BEFORE;

AFTER;

NEW DESK;

In other news;
Today would have marked my 10th wedding anniversary. It just dawned on me about 30 minutes ago. Like I’ve mentioned before, I’m glad it’s not going to be celebrated. I do feel a little.. off.. about it all though. I guess that’s normal. Sometimes it all seems so new, but it’s been over 10 months since the decision to divorce was made. I know in time I’ll gradually let go of all of these mixed emotions. I just wish I could right now, this moment.

I’ve been dealing with a lot of stress lately, and emotional garbage (not just from what’s been noted above) but also because of some family stuff. I know I’m rather sensitive at times, but I was really hurt last week by something someone I thought I was close to had said. Actually, a lot of things this person said. Frankly, I’m insulted and a bit enraged by most of it. I’m not going to get into the details, but I will say this — I have lost every ounce of respect for this person, and can say without a single doubt that I’ll never look at them the same. There’s just no way I could ever go back to the way things were now. I have forgiven people for a lot worse, so I know in time I’ll forgive her too.. but I will never, ever forget.

I have to cut this short now. I need to do something with my hair (which by the way, has been chopped to chin length — I am not crazy about it yet). I’m taking my 3 youngest nephews to the park this afternoon for a picnic because I lost a bet with them. Hey, I never thought they’d ring those two shots during our basketball shoot out!